Mother’s Day is here!

How could one miss it as flower shops, card stores and other miscellaneous gift emporiums advertise their wares?  Gracie’s Mom loved to drive and to travel.  

Gracie remembers years back in August they took a trip to Wyoming in a VW Beetle. Unbeknownst to Gracie, it was her Mom’s way of getting Gracie out of town so she would miss the one year anniversary of her dear, dear, friend’s unexpected death. This loss was very traumatic for Gracie as she and her friend had planned to go to high school together, and now she would have to go alone.  Her mother's scheme worked to some extent, though Gracie felt in an odd way that she had let her friend down by not being there.   Even though Gracie had a soft spot for animals and was delighted to see grizzly bears, moose, elk, mule deer, black bears to name a few, she was still glum and this may have been why Gracie messed up the navigation even with a  AAA triptik.  She was too young to drive and at one point her Mom could go no further and they ended up sleeping in the car at a truck stop. The truckers rocked the car back and forth to wake them up in the morning and took them to breakfast.  Angels come in all shapes and sizes.

This memory prompted Gracie to wear her Mom's engagement rings on her trip, so in this small way they could have another trip together.

Her Mom wore many hats….and she was a milliner (ha, ha), a choreographer, singer, baker, cook, costume designer, PTA president, Nurses Guild president, seamstress, painter, started driving at thirteen by driving her salesman dad on his route, daughter, sister, cousin, aunt, grandmother mother and a bonafide, somewhat  germaphobic registered nurse.  It is in this regard that Gracie thinks of her mother almost every day.  It goes like this: 

The urge hits, Gracie gets up, leaves whatever she is doing and heads off to the public bathroom.  The ritual begins, she opens the stall door, turns, locks the door.  She hikes up her skirt and then gets ready to pull down the panty hose and when just inches away from the seat she hears her mother’s voice:  “DON’T SIT ON THAT TOILET SEAT!” What a communication system! The vigilance and concern never stops.  Mum has been dead for almost twenty years – how does she know? Even so, when this happens, the voice comes as a surprise. You would think Gracie would remember by now.  The knees lock automatically and she stops and goes in midair simultaneously.  What coordination! Then, she hikes up the nylons, pulls down her skirt; takes a deep breath and shaking her head, turns the lock, walks out of the stall towards the sinks. Gracie knows she is being watched and of course she washes her hands.  The alternative is unthinkable!  Gracie feels sure that her Mum will visit her in her sleep  if she neglects this hygienic habit.

XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOX 

Gracie looks upward, winks and says out loud: “Wherever you are Mum, and I bet you are in heaven, I wish you a Happy Mother’s Day.  It is nice to know you will always care for me."

 Much love, 

Gracie

Copyright © 2015 Martina Sabo

Gracie Enters a Choice Playground

A Guardian of the Art Institute of Chicago

Not everyone thinks of an art museum as a playground but Gracie does.  This started decades ago when her Aunt “Gracie” took her to openings, special exhibits and the fun things associated with them.

They had special tickets to the Hirshhorn’s opening as Auntie was an artist and had connections.  It wasn’t crowded and she and her aunt were able to pose with the sculptures.  In one room they discovered a highly polished headless golden statue, with a ball in its lap.  Gracie and her aunt saw hinges on the ball and wondered what was inside it.  The guard noted their curiosity and invited Gracie to open it.  Really?!?!!? Oh, what a privilege; she thought as she ventured forward and placed her hands on the ball. As she opened it, an enormous penis appeared!  Both her aunt  and the guard found this highly amusing.  Gracie suspected that the guard knew all along.  Although Gracie was not a city girl, neither was she a country bumpkin.  She was shocked  both by the ball’s contents and its mechanical ascension, and the reactions of the other people in the room.  Eventually, however, she laughed too as the joke was on her.  She and her aunt moved on to other exhibits.

Gracie's Turn with a Daumier

Experiences like this taught Gracie to delight in art museums, so it is with pleasurable anticipation that that she goes into the Art Institute of Chicago.  She sees one of Honoré Daumier’s sculptured heads from his political satire period and remembers her aunt’s coiffed French twist as she bent forward, her nose almost touching a sculpture.  That memory inspires Gracie to get her picture taken.

She came to the museum equipped with a magnifying glass, which she uses to examine the myriad of brushstrokes in the Impressionist paintings.  Going from really close in and slowly backing way to see the entire picture still gives her a thrill. She employs this approach for Georges Seurat’s A Sunday on La Grande Jatte (1884), Monet’s Stacks of Wheat (1890), and then with other paintings including Picasso’s The Old Guitarist, (1903 – 1904), Grant Wood’s American Gothic, (1930) and Henri Matisse’s Bathers by a River (1910). There are so many framed visual feasts that she joyfully recalls an invaluable lesson she learned at the Metropolitan Museum of Art - turn off the camera flash and you can click to your heart’s delight, so you may rejoin your favorite paintings whenever you want.

She asks a guard to take a picture of her as she pretends to stroll with one of Alberto Giacometti’s creations.  His style was easy to mimic in art class, which seems so very long ago. She loved to sculpt but couldn't paint or draw very well.   She remembers her aunt pronouncing over her sketch book: "Thank God you can sing!"

 She delights in the childhood sweet treat in the cafeteria.  Gobs, as they are

called in Western Pennsylvania, were smaller and always wrapped in wax paper and were doled out to her and her friends as they played throughout the neighborhood.  Now that Gracie is older and weight is harder to loose, she opts for roasted veggies though she never wants to be as thin as a Giacometti sculpture.

Time is running away from her and she still has a fair distance to walk to catch her ride back to the Chicago suburbs, but she can’t resist the tree. She was surprised when she turned into a room to find a bare tree – mostly a trunk and a branch - laying on the floor.  So surprised in fact, that she didn't note the artist’s name which is rude to some extent.  Granted, Gracie loves trees in all their varieties and this looks like a photo op for sure.  She hands her camera to the guard and asks him to take her picture.  He seems a bit confused though he agrees. To his surprise Gracie drops to her knees, poses and says “Take the picture.”  He responds, “The alarm is going off move back!” Gracie asks again, “Please just take the picture, and I promise I’ll move and the alarm will turn itself off.” He gives in, and Gracie is sure that neither of them will forget this little incident.  In spite of setting off an alarm, though, Gracie leaves the museum unescorted.

Gracie Narrowly Escapes

Copyright © 2015 Martina Sabo

Another State and More Adventures

The next stop is under two hours away - Chicago.   Her GPS is set, and she leaves after lunch.  Gracie’s Road Trip Counselor has made sleeping arrangements for her with some of his friends.  Gracie feels that such a helpful person deserves a title with capital letters.

Gracie has found that there are two things that are difficult to enjoy on the road:  service for others and exercise.  She is just hoping that a gym might be in her future and so it is, because when she arrives at her host’s home, his wife is  ready to head to the gym and invites her along.  Gracie grabs her gloves and formulates a workout in her mind.  What a treat!  Who says instant gratification isn't rewarding and fun?

They take the couple’s child to his baseball practice where he will be picked up by friends so that the couple and Gracie will have time to do the gym, take a French bath (yes, that’s a few spritzes of body cologne) and go to dinner at a Thai restaurant.  The night continues and they pick up the young baseball player to go to their favorite desert place:  Portillos which has cake in a shake.  This concept is not new to Gracie.  Ever since she was a child, the family tradition was to put a slice of cake in a bowl and then pour milk over it.  If she indulges in cake to this day, she eats it in the same way but only around family and close friends.

Throughout the evening they have a wonderful time sharing memories of the friends they have in

Ride, Gracie, Ride

common.  Gracie is a bit taken aback, however, when they remind her of the time that they stayed in her home and toured the surrounding sites. Gracie rumbles through her mind trying to find that memory but it is nowhere to be found.  She is a bit embarrassed and decides there’s no faking this one, confesses that she doesn't remember and hopes they forgive her because there have been a lot of visitors in and out of her home and it was over a decade ago. They acknowledge that it was a big deal for them and that it is OK Gracie doesn't remember. Home they go. Gracie happily shares her hosts's commute  into Chicago the next morning. She can’t resist an animal photo op with a metal cow, which may or may not be part of the Cow Parade which was an exhibit of mostly fiberglass painted cow sculptures from years before.

There are fun things to do and lots of walking, no aimless meandering for this tourist.  She starts off by visiting a former colleague previously encountered only through work-related emails and phone conversations. They recognize one another from photos they exchanged and have a delightful visit.  Hopefully, come retirement, her friend will visit Gracie.

Afterwards Gracie heads out on foot to see “the Bean” which is the local nickname of a sculpture by Anish Kapoor.  Gracie   has no idea what to expect, since everyone who talks about it talks as if it is

something everyone should know.   This sculpture's real name is the Cloud Gate and it weighs in at over 110 tons.   It is 66 feet long and 33 feet high, yet it’s most striking feature is how it shines.  Although Composed of thousands of highly polished  stainless steel plates,no seams are visible. What can be seen are distorted people giggling over the fun house mirror effects once enjoyed by Gracie when  traveling carnivals came through places where she lived. Shutterbugs are clicking left and right and it is almost comical that in 2005 the City of Chicago tried to require permits to photograph the sculpture.  Gracie and probably millions of others are happy the city came to its senses.

Next stop, The Art Institute of Chicago....

Copyright © 2015 Martina Sabo

Gracie and a New Beach Experience

“Let’s go to the beach,” says “Suzie” enthusiastically.  Gracie has her doubts as she remembers her last visit to a beach, which was a compilation of humiliation, danger, and surprise. She knows from a radio talk show that the number one fear for women going to the beach is being seen in a bathing suit, but there are other things to fear as she quickly finds out.

The waves don’t really look very big, so Gracie is surprised at losing her footing and being knocked on all fours before the water has even reached her thighs. She spits sea water out of her mouth and snorts it out of her nose, as the sand is pulled from underneath of her each time she attempts to get up.  She worries about her left leg as she feels a jab of pain near her knee, where she underwent much physical therapy to get the IT band limber. She’s up.  No she’s down; spit and snort.   This goes on for about three rounds until finally someone grabs her by the arm and pulls her forward.  Her rescuer, a young girl about age 12, commands Gracie, “arriba!” and struggles to drag her out of the ocean.  She is sweet and even tolerates Gracie’s oft-repeated ”Muchas Gracias!!” Thank heaven for that girl’s tenacity.  Gracie doesn’t feel embarrassed, just grateful for her rescue.  Her host eggs her on to go back in the water and she thinks “Is he nutters or just a misogynist?”  Later on, though, she discovers that he didn’t know she had run into difficulties in the ocean, so obviously he is neither. Today’s beach experience has got to be better than that one. 

The Common Lake Gull

For starters, it’s Lake Michigan, not the Atlantic Ocean.  Gracie and “Suzie” pick up their beach chairs and walk a few blocks to the beach, which has little, gentle waves.  The water is quite cold, even though it’s August.  Gracie prefers Caribbean temperatures so she won’t be venturing in too far.  They set up their spot for sitting, and relax, talking about their children, cooking, baking, art, and massaging their feet in the sand.  She looks out at the sea gulls but is corrected in that they are "lake" gulls. There is also Indiana’s oldest and only surviving lighthouse built in 1858.

The lighthouse has an interesting history.  In 1861, Miss Harriet Colfax, a multi-talented voice and piano teacher, and typesetter, added lighthouse keeping to her list of accomplishments.  She took care of the light for 43 years, finally retiring in 1904 at age 80.  In all her record-setting years of service the light never failed between sunset and sunrise.  She died on April 16, 1905.  What a remarkable woman she must have been.

Back in the present, Suzie picks up a flat black stone and promises to make it into a souvenir of Gracie’s visit.  Later, but not much later, as promised, she turns it into a miniature work of art.   Suzie instructs Gracie:  “when the waves get rough, look to the light.”   It has a place of honor on her car’s dashboard to this very day. 

Copyright © 2015 Martina Sabo

Gracie and a Fount of Creativity

It’s time to enjoy Cuz’s better half “Susie”, a wonderful, fun loving person, bubbling with creativity.

Her art adorns the walls of the local Methodist church - from the mural in the church sanctuary down to cartoon-like animals for the nursery children to delight in.  There is nothing like a Noah’s Ark to provide entertaining subject matter!  The penguins and camels catch Gracie’s interest.   Penguins are Gracie’s favorite animals, and the camels remind her of a fulfilling activity she did in the past. 

When Gracie would hear of someone who needed a little extra help over a bump in life her heart would ache, as she often was not in a position to help those people herself.  So she would email darn near everyone she knew, describing the situation at hand without mentioning any names, and ask her friends if they would donate a small sum. It was always within the community and the response was always just enough to cover anything from one month's rent to underwear for a family. She called this the Camelid Trust (a name inspired by Christ’s teachings on wealth in Matthew 19:24).

Susie and Her Dad

Norwegian Rosemåling  

Gracie Slept Here

Mordiford Heart

Suzie and Cuz’s home is filled with yet more manifestations of her many talents.  The walls are accented with her paintings.  Some are come from her imagination, such as the painting for her mother’s living room, which picks up the yellow and orange colors of a typical seventies décor – created to help pull the room together.  Others are taken from black and white photographs such as the ones Susie and her Dad and of Susie’s aunt in England.  Norwegian Rosemåling covers a chest in one of the bedrooms and another bedroom has a painting and homemade bedspread and drapes.   Gracie is thrilled when “Suzie” gives her a wheat weaving based on the Mordiford Heart, a design that originated on the English/Welsh border and later gained significance in Ireland.  Receiving one is considered good luck.

On a Good Old Iron Skillet

More creativity in the kitchen, where Gracie is taught to make griddle scones using "Suzie's" mother's recipe.  She learns that the pronunciation of "scone" is based on where you are from in Scotland so it's not scone (rhymes with own) but "scawn" (rhymes with lawn).  Gracie has to promise that she won't share the recipe with anyone else; a request she will honor of course. She knows she will make "scawns" often as the recipe is compatible with food storage items. Gracie maintains that "a good cook is a good thief", because she believes that all cooks have a specialty that they make better than anyone else Gracie considers it one of her missions in life to collect as many of those recipes as possible.  She will return to "Suzie's" kitchen in the coming year to learn the intricacies of Scottish shortbread.  What is your best dish and will you share that recipe with Gracie?

Copyright © 2015 Martina Sabo

Gracie and Family History

Gracie has no desire to leave the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame and Museum.   She embarks much later than planned on her five-hour journey to visit one of her cousins in Indiana.  He is a first cousin once removed or a second cousin, or is that the same thing?  Gracie is not clear on which, but this generation has taught Gracie a lot about her family and life. 

Another cousin from another state gave Gracie an insight into her  grandmother, who was widowed in her early forties. Grandma was very fond of Elvis Presley, which puzzled Gracie until this cousin shared her feelings about being widowed at the same age.  She said, “It was very difficult to be left alone with four children, getting a job, juggling everything and getting over the shock of his untimely death.  What I missed the most was that all of a sudden, I was no longer a woman. When I was doing the dishes, he no longer sauntered up behind me, put his arms around me, caressed me and whispered sweet loving words in my ear and then nibbled my neck.  That part of me was extinguished.”  Even after all these decades it is evident she still cherishes him. It is said that women reach their sexual peak around the age these women were widowed.  Gracie never thought of her grandmother as having sexual desires. Gracie chuckles to herself, as she remembers that when they were children she and her friends thought that their parents only made love once for each child they conceived.  Being older and having children of her own, Gracie grins as she incorporates this knowledge into her understanding of Grandma. Suddenly her interest in the gyrating King of Rock and Roll makes plenty of sense. 

Gracie drives and eventually stops at a rest area for a bathroom break.  She worries that she will reach the Indiana Cousins far later than she said she would.  Gracie is time zone impaired, however this time it is working in her favor.  She knows the sun travels east to west but can’t convert this information into clock hours in her head.  She will gain an hour because of a time zone change and it bewilders her that she  will drive 5 hours and possibly get to her destination on time.  Did the computer printout of her route already compute the time change in or not?  To be honest, this is beyond her so she just keeps the pedal to the metal and keeps on driving. 

 She arrives to a warm welcome.  This meeting came about because  this previously unknown cousin put things in motion by sending  a letter to Gracie inquiring if she had any information about a man who turned out to be their common ancestor — his grandfather, her great- grandfather. At the time she almost didn't open the letter because of the way it was addressed.   She was about to toss it in the trashcan when a voice in her heart said, “just read the letter.” “Do you know who my Grandfather is?” seems like a simple question, but Gracie remembers the family story about a set of identical twins, who swapped husbands.  How to tell someone you don’t know about the skeleton in the family closet?  He might just be fine with the information, but then again he might not.  She ponders this for a couple of days and eventually telephones him and explains the situation.  Yes, they have a common ancestor but Gracie isn't sure of his grandfather’s identity, as it could be either one of two men. “Cuz”, as she now affectionately calls him, chuckles and says “this will be an interesting genealogical research project indeed….” And he is right.  With his research skills and her people skills, they make a great team

He finds two living common relatives and he and Gracie decide that personable Gracie will approach this cousin and see if she can shed any light on their question.  Unfortunately, one of these two “new” cousins will have nothing to do them meaning Gracie and the genealogist cousin.  However, “Julie” (not her real name) is willing to talk to Gracie on the phone. The family history plot thickens when Gracie discovers that there was only one man involved and he fathered children with both of the twins.  (From henceforth, his nickname is Frisky!) The other cousin, Julie’s sister  remains unwilling to talk about all this as it opened old wounds for her.  Happily, “Julie” is willing to talk about her memories of picnics with everyone, her sadness at seeing her dad in the park with her aunt, not her mother.  Despite being told the woman was her mother by the friend that was with her, she knew better.  More conversations reveal that there is yet another cousin a generation down on the family tree.  It’s time to lay the past to rest.  They meet at “Julie’s” home, over Kentucky Fried Chicken, look at pictures, and discuss memories.   Everyone concerned feels uplifted and healed.  Gracie is still in touch with all of them.  To Gracie this is a testament to the fact that families can be together for a long time if not forever.

Copyright © 2015 Martina Sabo 

Rock and Roll Hall of Fame and Museum (Part II)

Gracie continues through the museum.  She recognizes more names than not.  It’s like being invited to party down in a beautifully cleaned and well maintained giant house.

She goes to the Induction Ceremony Highlights film and finds a seat, not really intending to stay for the entire film, but her attention becomes riveted to the screen as she laughs one minute and cries the next, tears welling in her eyes as she remembers some of those rock stars dying of overdoses.  In less than a year the world lost Jimmy Hendrix (Inducted 1992), Janis Joplin (Inducted 1995) and Jim Morrison, (Inducted 1993 via The Doors). Gracie realizes it was probably a good thing that she didn’t get into the high school rock band, as she could have ended up the same way, given her addictive personality traits.  Even in college, friends often stated that there was no need for her to indulge in drugs because she was pretty out there without them. Good thing Gracie feels the universe watches over her.

She keeps rhythm with her body because there is just no sitting still. She looks around and notices there is only one other person keeping time, just with one hand and one foot.  This amazes Gracie to the point that when the film ends she gets ready to go but stops to ask the usher:  “Am I seeing this correctly?  People just come in, sit down and watch the film?  They don’t move, grove or feel the beat?” He laughs and then responds, “Lady, we have been watching you since you came in.  You are dancing through this museum. Your joy is obvious and you have been fun to watch.” She is a bit surprised by his comment though she has to admit that she is definitely in her own world and having a glorious visit.

Before entry

Her memories are jumbled being brought to the fore by whomever or whatever is in front of her.  Upon seeing a Beatles picture she remembers her older sister swooning and screaming whenever Frank Sinatra would come on the radio.  Gracie shared a bedroom with her and each night they would look up at the ceiling plastered with  Old Blue Eyes pictures and piously say,  “Good-night, Frank.”  As time goes by Gracie eventually does the same thing when the British Invasion came with the Fab Four (Inducted 1988) and though she screams with adolescent fervor for all of them, she is in love with George Harrison (Inducted 2004).  He is so handsome, with penetrating, focused eyes.  Gracie likes a man with long hair, face fur (mustache and beard), and a spiritual bent. He fulfills all of these requirements and after saving up her money she buys her own albums to play on the stereo.  History does repeat itself that’s for sure.

After entry

It’s also the first time that she experiences English accents.  This is helpful as she eventually lands leading roles of English women in musicals and plays.  To this day if Gracie is in a tense situation, that accent surfaces and returns her to the safety of the stage.  She gets through whatever is thrust at her. Another memory brings a smile to her heart.  When she had her babysitting business she often had trouble remembering their names.  Don’t scoff, even parents mix up the names of their children.  She solved this problem by telling them that they all had to rally around when she yelled “George.” Sure enough, it worked.  They would all come running and she would explain which “George”  she wanted. 

“All Things Must Pass” (George Harrison)… Gracie is shocked when she finally sits down to check the time.  Over five hours have passed since she entered the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame and Museum and it seems like time stood still.  Gracie certainly feels that she has been “embrace[d], engage[d], [taught], and inspire[d] through the power of rock and roll.” It’s the best money she spent in a long time and she decides to celebrate with a trip to the gift store.  This makes a nice change.  When she was a single parent they sometimes had enough money to go places but souvenirs weren’t in the budget.  Happily, “These Times They Are a Changin’” (Bob Dylan, Inducted 1988) and Gracie buys herself a shirt and the children get postcards with artists according to their musical preferences.

Gracie's Life Path in Record Album Covers
(as of now)

With all this said and done, the question is, can Gracie bear to leave? Regardless, she knows she will encourage anyone and everyone to visit the remarkable Rock and Roll Hall of Fame and Museum.  

Copyright © 2015 Martina Sabo